Sunday, October 14, 2012

Zombies and Tweed


Hello!
               So as I was sitting back in my easy chair in front of a roaring fire, with my tweed jacket with leather padded elbows on my shoulders and my dog at my feet, reading awful English poetry, I realized something. An epiphany, if you will. Not really, I’ve actually been thinking about this for a while now, but that’s how I imagine people that aren’t me having epiphanies.
               Really, though. Way too many people just take life at a dead sprint, one hundred percent power one hundred percent of the time. That’s good and all, and it can help you get some things done. But you’ll wear yourself down doing it, and no one wants to see your zombie, husk-of-a-person self wandering around the workplace, or school, or wherever you tend to roam.
               So every once in a while, pull the emergency brake so the roaring death trap that is the sedan of your life comes screeching to a halt. Then calmly step out of the vehicle and walk to the roadside, bend over, and take a whiff of those roses.
               The other day as I was walking out to grab my mail, some 200 year-old bat drove by in her bright yellow Hummer with massive tires. I swear, the woman swerved to my side of the street, and she almost hit me. Of course, I was saved by my ninja-like reflexes, and not caught like a deer in the headlights. But the important thing is that this crazy old lady was driving at least 30 miles over the speed limit on a residential street in a “good” part of town. Perhaps she was having a stroke, or brain aneurism, or some other old-person thing, but that doesn’t mean she can drive like that. Well, maybe it does, but it still makes me mad.
               To all you other crazy drivers out there, take life a little slower. What’s so important that you need to save the 14 seconds it takes to swerve around a car that’s going exactly the speed limit? Do you really have that little time?
               In life, you really have to enjoy the little things. They’re what make us human, and being human is nice (See zombie comments above). Some people assume that it takes big, earth moving things to make them happy, like copious amounts of money, or a nice shiny new car, or something. But if you learn to appreciate the little things, by stopping to smell the roses, than maybe your life will be that much better.
               Stay tuned next time for your talks about life with me, from my nice comfy easy chair, dog, and fireplace. And tweed. Have I mentioned tweed?
Thanks for reading!
Matt Finley

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